Embracing Autumn

Autumn at home - photo credit Karen Horn

I've never really cared much for autumn but I'm so looking forward to it this year. After a long, dry summer here in drought stricken far-northern California, the recent bit of rain (and more that we anticipate in the coming week) provides welcome relief. Driving to town yesterday, I noticed that some of the grass along the road has even greened up, which provides a nice contrast to the turning colors of the leaves. And the cooler daytime temperatures, light breeze and crisp-ish night air are sure appreciated.

Then I realized that I am now firmly in autumn in my life seasons, as well. Hmm... How did that happen? Where did summer go?

Two things have happened recently that have made me think more about the seasons of life.

First, I've been spending some time visiting at a rehab hospital that also includes long-term care, which has given me more than a glimpse at life's winter season. Not pretty for many but as with other seasons, each person's experience is largely based on attitude. While some folks choose to continue to live their life despite failing health, others choose to simply exist. When I reach winter, I want to be in the first group.

Secondly, a woman I've known several decades just died unexpectedly at the young age of 71. Although I intend to live to 100, you just never know how much time you really have left. Rather than being depressed by this fact, I'm reminded of how important it is to really live each day.

So... I'm embracing autumn. Care to join me?

Advanced Age at 65?

In researching specific risk factors recently, I discovered that "advanced age" is 65 or older. Say what? I'm less than a decade from entering advanced age? I thought reaching advanced age wouldn't happen until in the 80s. Maybe even the 90s. For some, I guess it could be 75 or so. But 65? This just can't be right! Fortunately, right after making this shocking and horrifying discovery, I happened upon Grandma Gatewood's Walk.

Have you ever heard of Emma Gatewood? A few years before I was even born, this woman hiked the Appalachian Trail...when she was 67! Not only did she thru-hike the whole 2,000+ miles way back in 1955, she did it with just a few items stuffed in a homemade denim bag thrown over her shoulder.

Wearing Keds and packing a change of clothes and a few other necessities (she didn't even have a sleeping bag!), she's the first woman to make the journey and the fifth hiker to walk the trail end to end. And did I mention she was 67?

If that's not impressive enough, she actually thru-hiked the AT three times before she turned 76. Now that's a lot of walking!

A few years ago, I posted about Grace Small, the Hitchhiking Grandmother. These women are such an inspiration! Not that I aspire to follow in their footsteps, mind you. But it sure reinforces that age doesn't have to dictate what you can accomplish and "advanced age" at 65 is just a bunch of BS.

NOTE: Book image is an affiliate link. As I've said before, this is the easiest way I know to include photos in blog posts. If you're signed up with Kindle Unlimited, you can read it for free like I did. Otherwise, check your local library.

Are You Actually Enjoying Your Life?

Enjoy your life!

Just read a post by Shelagh Cummins, a business trainer & consultant for Mom Entrepreneurs and co-founder of MomBiz.com, and had to share a nugget of wisdom that applies to any area of life. In her Overcome Potential Obstacles post, Shelagh suggests creating a chart that lists potential obstacles you may need to overcome and your solution. The one that really hit home with me is this:

You realize halfway through the year that you’re not enjoying what you’re doing / You’re the boss… you get to close shop or hire someone.

Think about it - you really ARE the boss. While Shelagh is talking specifically about business, I want to go one step further and ask, "Are you enjoying your life?" If not, what can you do about it? What changes can you make to quit doing or make easier the things you don't enjoy?

Then over at Clear Voice Branding, Heather Poduska (personal branding strategist for female entrepreneurs) shares what to do when you don't see results. Again, this advice is aimed at business, but it applies to all areas of life. What specifically hit home with me is this:

You may not be focusing on the right activities...being busy and being productive are not the same thing...(what) activities...are a) absolutely necessary to run your business b) which ones have historically led to the kinds of results you are looking for. If an activity doesn’t fall into one of those two categories, either cut back on it or ditch it completely.

Beings it's the first day of Spring (yippee!!!) and time to do some spring cleaning, I think I'll focus on some life areas to spruce up in addition to those home areas that need attention. How about you? Is how you're spending your time either necessary or leading to the results you desire? If not, what can you do about it?

How Do You Want to be Remembered?

Mavis Balvin 1929-2011
Remembered fondly, missed a bunch!

Have you thought about how you want to be remembered? If you're under 50, this probably hasn't even crossed your mind. But if you're anywhere in the second half, even if you've just barely hit the 50-year mark, you need to start considering the types of memories you're creating for the people around you each and every day. And the further you are on the plus side of 50, the more serious you need to be. Unless, of course, you don't care how you're remembered. If that's truly the case, you can quit reading now.

I've been giving this a lot of thought lately. After all, the older I get, the older others get, as well - so I now have numerous examples to follow (or not) just one generation up. Yikes! Does that mean I'm nearly old? Hmm.

Well, anyway...

One woman particularly sticks out in my mind as someone to emulate. Although she is no longer with us, Mavis lives on in the memories of friends and family as a woman who loved life and brought joy to those who knew her. A ready smile and kind words were Mavis' hallmark. What a way to be remembered! Where do I sign up for that? Oh yeah - with my actions.

Experiences Create Memories

Always remember that memories are generated from experiences, not words. Don't expect to be remembered for what you say, expect to be remembered for your actions and how they affect others. If you want folks to remember nice things about you, give them something nice to remember! And this isn't just for after you're gone from this life - it applies every day that you're still here, as well.

So...

What memories are you creating today?

How to Stay Young

Well, I'm now firmly into my mid-50s. That's right - I just turned 55. For those who remember the roll out of the National Maximum Speed Law way back in the 1970s...that's kind of how I feel - seems like someone is trying to slow me down! I may even qualify for the senior discount at a few places. How did this happen?

But what does the speed limit have to do with staying young? Not much, but I thought the sign was a cute addition to this post. What I really wanted to share is a cool thing I thought of that anyone can do to help them stay younger.

Have a physical assessment

I recently watched a physical therapist do an assessment of an 83-year-old woman and was impressed with how much he could tell about her condition just from feeling her spine. No x-rays, no scans, no nothing - simple touch. How non-invasive is that? Anyway, it got me to thinking - might it be smart to have an assessment now, while I'm young enough to take some corrective action if I have any problems brewing? Why wait until I'm actually old to find out I could have prevented some pain and immobility? Do I want to be confined to a lift chair? Do I want to use a walker? No! So I made an appointment and had a full assessment done. Happy Birthday to me!

The results were surprising. It seems I stand a little crooked - kind of lower at the left shoulder with my head leaning slightly to the left and forward. I also have some hip issues. So what to do? Well, it's surprisingly simple - a few easy exercises for the hips and some posture work in the mirror. There were several other suggestions, as well, that I will incorporate into my daily routine but the biggies for avoiding problems down the line are the posture adjustment and hip exercises.

Make an appointment today!

When you call to make an appointment, don't be surprised if they don't have a clue what you're talking about. I know my local physical therapist didn't, but he thought it was a great idea. And yes, you can refer yourself - at least for just one or two visits. And yes, you'll probably have to pay for it yourself (my 1.5 hour appointment was $96) but it is well worth the cost for the physical therapist's expertise. So get on the phone now so that you can find out how you can avoid problems in the future and stay as young as possible. Trust me - you want to do this!

What is Old Age?

Old age can be a blissful time spent enjoying family and the fruits of your labors or it can be hell for you and everyone around you. Is there any middle ground? Of course - there's a lot of space between these two extremes but don't you want to end up closer to the first scenario than the second?

Old age is also a state of being, not a number. Some people are old by 50 while others are still sprightly at 80. As we say in my neck of the woods, it isn't the years, it's the miles that count.

I've been pondering differences in aging of late and clearly see that the way you age has more to do with choices and attitude than anything beyond your control. Some people insist that genetics is the most important factor in how we age but I suspect they're just using their family history as an excuse to avoid making changes in diet and/or lifestyle. Granted, people born with a tendency toward some affliction or another have more challenges than those who aren't, but you just have to take what you're given and work with it, right?

I'm off my intended 2013 posting schedule here at The Best 50 Years because I've spent the entire middle of the month away from home helping with the care of an 83-year-old invalid. Now that I'm home for a few days, I'll try to play catch up but no guarantees - I'm way behind on Project DO and we're kind of off the Cake-a-Week program beings we're rotating in and out (and will be for the foreseeable future). I'm also way behind on my custom memorial quilt orders so need to put all my attention there.

But here's a question for you all: How will old age be for you? Give this some serious thought. The decisions you make today and every day from here on out will determine how you age and how you feel and live when you finally get there.

How to Prepare for Your Golden Years

Dispense with Denial – Anyone who lives long enough eventually gets old. If you live long enough, you will too. Embrace this fact as a part of life and plan for it as best as you can.

Take Care of Your Health – Be proactive when it comes to your health. Eat right and get enough exercise. Maintain a healthy weight. Don’t put off treating minor health concerns. Those little problems that are a mere annoyance now can become debilitating if ignored. Work with your doctor to preserve your health and mobility. And if your doctor isn’t working with you, find one who will.

Explore Your Options – Where will you live if you need help with daily tasks? While we may all want to stay independently in our own homes and then die peacefully in our sleep after a long and fulfilling life, it does not always work out that way. Do you have younger family members with the time, interest and stamina to provide assistance on an ongoing basis? Would you prefer a nice facility with people close to your age and around-the-clock staff? The time to explore your options and make some plans is well before you have the need.

Consider Whether to Buy Long-term Care Insurance – Quality care is expensive. (For that matter, I guess crappy care is expensive, too.) According to AARP, about 7 million Americans receive some type of long-term care each year. Do you need long-term care insurance? That depends on a number of factors but the longer you wait, the more expensive it is. Will I buy it? I don’t know yet. It seems I read somewhere that the optimal time to purchase a policy is around age 60 so I’ve got a few years yet. I could buy a basic policy right now for under $40/month. If I were currently 60, the monthly price would be just over $52, however.

Another interesting fact for those on a budget (who isn’t?): “If cost is a concern, choose a Total Coverage Amount that should last about three years. In 9 out of 10 cases, a 2005 actuarial study shows that long-term care claims are lasting three years or less.” (Long Term Care Claims, A Special Report, Milliman Consultants and Actuaries, April 2005)

Learn to Play Cards – Years ago my daughter’s Brownie Troop adopted grandparents at the local convalescent home. For several years we made weekly visits to see May, a delightful lady who taught us to play Skip-Bo. We have many happy memories of playing cards with May and I realized that cards are the perfect pastime for the elderly. Not only does playing cards help keep your mind nimble, it requires no special skill, physical prowess or agility. And you can enjoy a game of cards with just about anyone of any age. Talk about a fun social activity that spans the generations!

How Old is Old?

I read today on WiseGeek that “Of all the people in history that have reached 65 years of age, half of them are living right now.” I can’t seem to find the source of this statistic but thought I’d share anyway. Think about this for just a minute. Do you remember when 50 was old? And I’m not just talking because you were a little kid and 20, 30 and 40 were also old. I’m talking about when people really did seem older at a much earlier age than they do now.

Have you ever heard of Grace Small? My mom shared The Hitchhiking Grandmother with me several years ago about this “elderly” woman who hitchhiked around the country. Looking at her pictures standing by the road, she does look like a little old granny. NOT. She was less than 50 when she hitched her first 1,000-miles trip. She did continue hitchhiking into her 80s, however, but the photos I saw were from a much earlier time.

So how old is old? Some say you’re only as old as you feel. Oops - some days that makes me pretty darn old! Some say that age is just a number. That may be true but it’s an easier position to espouse the further you are from the century mark. What I do know is that old is not nearly as old now for many people as it was during my grandparents' day.

Since my earliest memories, I’ve pretty much always planned to see 100. I don’t know where I got the idea. Maybe I didn’t realize how old 100 actually is, or maybe it was just a nice-sounding number. Now that I’m over halfway there, it still seems attainable and desirable. And it looks like I’ll be in good company with all the rest of you who are marching toward the triple digits with optimism and enthusiasm for life. Just keep remembering that the best years really are yet to come.


BTW - although I’ve included an Amazon affiliate link up there in the second paragraph, check your library before you rush out to buy the book.

Learn Something New to Exercise Your Brain

Thumbs up to lifelong learning!

Just like every other part of your body, your brain must work-out to stay in shape, so I just signed up for three classes through KSURF Virtual University. That’s right - I don’t already have enough to do. Never mind all my unfinished projects - I’ll just let my adult-onset ADD get the better of me yet again and add some more stuff to my plate. But they’re great classes . . . really!

My KSURF Story

I found out about KSUF a few months ago and signed up for a free class through an introductory promotion for new students. I really enjoyed the online format and got a lot out of the class. My favorite parts were working at my own pace and no required homework or tests. You see, although I love learning and even fancied that I might enjoy life as a professional student at one point, after I finally finished up my degree during my 30s, I swore off anything that involved term papers or tests.

Well, I liked the free class so much that I just couldn’t resist signing up for more when KSURF offered a holiday discount - either $5 off $20 or $10 off $40. Simple math tells me which the better deal is so I selected $45 worth of classes despite the fact that I already had plenty of projects in the works. See how susceptible I am to bargains? (I’m also a sucker for free shipping and never order anything from Amazon without exceeding $25.)

A Few More Details

Anyway, with KSUR classes, you can start at any time and have two months to finish. You can submit assignments or not, take the final or not - your choice. If you don’t take the final, however, you won’t receive credit for the class on your transcript but I don’t care about that. But for those who need CEUs, you’d have to be more serious about finishing up. Also, check ahead of time to make sure that the CEUs earned through KSURF are accepted by your employer or organization or association or whatever.

Now for my new classes - I’m taking How to Be Organized In Spite of Yourself, Intro to Personal Journaling, and Memoir Writing: The Journey to Myself. So see? They’re all useful on a personal and a professional level. I’ve started the first lesson in How to Be Organized and have discovered how few hours are in a week but that’s a subject for a different post. Suffice to say, you will be learning along with me if you follow this blog.

Now Exercise YOUR Brain!

So exercise your brain today. Resolve to learn something new on a regular basis throughout the year. Try an online class, read up on an unfamiliar subject, start a new hobby, or try your hand at Sudoku or logic puzzles (my two personal favorites). Regardless of age, but especially as you get older, brain exercise is critical. And it’s easy - you don’t even work up a sweat or get out of breath (two things I'd rather avoid). So what are you waiting for? And if you know of other online learning opportunities, please leave a comment and share with the rest of us!

Please note: I am not affiliated with KSURF other than as a student and am simply sharing my personal thoughts and experience.

Be a Quitter! Stop Finishing Books

Stop wasting precious time finishing books that don’t grab you in the first few chapters. Life is just plain too short – you can’t possibly read every book there is anyway so be choosy!

It took me a long time to come to this conclusion but I’m so glad I did. In fact, it’s one of my New Year’s goals. So far so good – I have at least four books that I’ve quit reading after only wasting an hour or two on them. Think how much extra time I’ll have at my disposable over the course of a full year!

If you’re like I was and have a relentless compulsion to finish books once started, give yourself permission to stop this counterproductive behavior starting now. Resolve that you are not going to continue reading books that are boring, offensive or stupid. It doesn’t matter what the critics say – the only thing that is important is how you feel about the book. It is your time being spent, after all.

If necessary, gain some first hand experience with quitting. Get a book or two (or three) that you KNOW you don’t want to read and practice quitting during the first few chapters – or even the first few pages. Imagine how much more enjoyable your reading time will be when you only read those books that are worthwhile!

Is It Ever Too Late To Reinvent Yourself?

This is a question that was posed recently in a query looking for stories and advice from people who have started a business after 50. As I was drafting my response, I realized it should be a post to this blog. Duh. So here it is –

Too late? Never! Just after 50 I started a custom memorial quilt service. Drawing upon my life-long sewing experience, my relatively new interest in quilting and my tendency to re-purpose clothing, I began taking orders for custom memorial quilts and have created several keepsakes from clothing is the past year and a half. Then this past summer I began taking on some freelance writing and in the past few weeks I’ve opened an Etsy shop. So that’s actually three small businesses I’ve started after 50.

My advice to other retirees contemplating starting a business?

• Think about what you know and what you love to find a good fit for you.
• Stay alert – opportunity often knocks softly.
• Focus on developing several small income streams rather than relying on just one or two larger ones.
• Start slow and test the waters but give each idea a fair shot.
• Set parameters on how much time, money and other resources are to be committed to each endeavor and stay within those parameters.
• Have a clear definition of success for each venture and a set date on which it will end if goals are not being met. NOTE: This isn’t about giving up but rather about realistically assessing whether or not something is working.
• Regularly reevaluate, remain flexible and make appropriate changes when warranted.

As stated in the side bar of this blog, I really do believe that the best years are yet to come!

Live Each Day to the Fullest -

"It's only when we truly know and understand that we have limited time on earth - and that we have no way of knowing when our time is up - that we will begin to live each day to the fullest, as if it was the only one we had."


Elisabeth Kubler-Ross

Loving Life at 80 -

Today I had the opportunity to visit with a delightful lady who recently turned 80. She's quite sprightly and obviously enjoys life. When asked what her secret is to staying young, she said that she stays active and is involved with a lot of people. She has a wide circle of friends, travels with a specific bus tour company on a regular basis and socializes frequently, participating in game nights and other activities. I’ve realized of late just how important these human interactions are as we age, especially for seniors living alone. People who are isolated for one reason or another seem to experience a decrease in communication skills. Once those skills are gone, they are difficult to re-develop. Don’t let this happen to you! Cultivate friends of all ages, stay connected with a variety of people and keep up your communications skills.

How Long Do I Really Have?

The women in my family tend to live long, healthy lives. My grandmothers both lived independently into their late 80s or early 90s. One actually tried an assisted living facility but decided it wasn’t for her so found a small cottage to rent. My mother is still very youthful and active at nearly 70.

Some of the men aren't doing so bad in the longevity area either. My dad is going strong at almost 77 and his oldest brother intends to hit 100 (he's close to 90 now). So these are the examples I look to. I plan to go to at least 100, so I guess I’d better get started!